Gap Year Reflections
After returning to employment after a gap year to pause, reflect and experience life in a broader sense, I've learnt a few notable lessons.
Avoid tunnel vision on chasing goals and dreams at the expense of experiencing the richness of life. I'd been study and career focused until a reality dawned on me: my dream job became outdated; it was no longer what I wanted. This left me worried and directionless. Despite this, I experienced life more fully through creative storytelling opportunities (theatre, writing, podcasting, songwriting), embarking on swimming and skateboarding, expanding community connections and travelling.
Growth and evolution as a person involves letting go of ideas, beliefs, habits, actions and connections that no longer align with who we are.
How others treat me is often a reflection of how I treat myself. Throughout therapy, I realised that I used to subconsciously allow myself to not take up space in the world, mask, conform to the norm, people-please and suppress authenticity. Ever since this has changed from the root, up, I listen to my inner voice and gut intuition, do not tolerate disrespect and assert my voice more. For example, permanently disconnecting from someone where talk and behaviours were repeatedly incongruent, and who did not reciprocate effort. Had I continued tolerating this, it would imply to myself, “I deserve to be undervalued, treated as unimportant and be played with”.
It's important to treat myself as I would my best friends and family, and not as someone exclusionary who deserves ‘less than’.
Don't wait for “the perfect timing” to take action or embark on something of importance to you. If something is on your priority list, create time and space for it instead of waiting around for things to fall into place. If circumstances or situations change, then we adapt to it if and when it arises. It's better to work with concrete reality than hypotheticals.